Definitive Proof

Have you been a good girl today….

I think we all know the answer.

Hammer House of The Horrors

Like to bang things don’t they, kids.

Bang things and press buttons.

The other day when we went on an exciting family trip to Comet to buy a new hoover, the G2 (my newly, as in just thought up, shorthand for the Gruesome Twosome) unexpectedly found themselves in an aisle of pristine, unsullied washing machines. . . . → Read More: Hammer House of The Horrors


In the Big Book of Lightbulb Changing Jokes, a particular favourite of mine goes thus;

Q. How many Roadies does it take to change a lightbulb?

A. Two…Two…One…Two…


That’s not my favourite joke however. My favourite joke is…

Q. What’s the hardest thing about learning to rollerblade?

A. Telling . . . → Read More: Two

Poetic License

Keats. Coleridge. Byron. Ayres.

Undoubtedly the greatest romanticists of the past 400 years or so. Each possessing the ability to craft a few humble words and elevate them to the upper echelons of poetic super-stardom.

They are verse virtuosos and prose professionals.

They are Rhyme Animals.

But what’s this? A new kid on the block. . . . → Read More: Poetic License