Crawlageddon – The Movie

Be alert, be very alert

The Horrors needed a horror film.

And nothing’s more scary than two all-too-mobile pre-toddlers.

A Model Child

She’s doing that Twiggy thing she did in the Hats photoshoot.

Tilly strikes another pose. She L.O.V.E.S the camera

Not quite as good but she certainly knows how to Vogue it up.

One to watch Storm.

Eatin’s Cheatin

The Horrors have decided that, blueberries and sweetcorn aside, eating is rather passé.

And woe betide anyone who tries to feed them with a spoon. Oh no, these two gastronomes (with emphasis on the gnome bit) are more than capable of feeding themselves thank you very much, it’s just that they don’t want to at the moment.

Which is surprising as they, and when i say they, i mainly mean she, like to put almost anything else they come across into their mouths.

Here’s a list of the things the gruesome twosome have eaten that they shouldn’t.


Granny’s lipstick
A snail (potentially. Shell has been pulled from his mouth snail-less)


Catfood (both meat and biscuits)
A dandelion
Her own sick
Part of an eraser
Some of a Wessex Cancer Trust novelty rubber golf ball
The swing tag from a toy in a shop (the toy had to be purchased)
Fluff, lots of fluff
Charlie’s Epiderm (that’s his skin cream, not his actual skin)
E45 Cream
A Strepsil (sucked)

An interesting menu i’m sure you’ll agree. And with this in mind a question springs to mind.

What the bloody hell is wrong with toast?

You loved it last week!

My Family and Other Animals

The Starrs joined The Trainors for a trip to London Zoo the other day.

True to form the three members of the party under 10 months really didn’t care where they were, as long as Blueberries were involved (for our two at least).

Needless to say us parents had a ball.

Here are some photos, . . . → Read More: My Family and Other Animals

The Gift that Keeps on Giving

Yes readers, we’re revisiting an old favourite (of mine & H’s) again, with the Amazing Mathilda Poo Face.

This time we’ve gone for a kinda, faux animation, virtual flick book sort of thing.

All you need to do is scroll down the page while blinking really fast and marvel at the speed in which she . . . → Read More: The Gift that Keeps on Giving

New(ish) Panicing Parents 0 – ‘Acute Viral Infections’ that Really aren’t that Bad 1

There have been many before us. Awoken from a TV stupor by the rasping, barking cough of a child.

An investigation ensued. The barks more harrowing as he fights to catch his breath, wheezing and snotty.

“What do you think?”

“I don’t know, he doesn’t look good”.

Worried looks were shared. He was fine when . . . → Read More: New(ish) Panicing Parents 0 – ‘Acute Viral Infections’ that Really aren’t that Bad 1

Do ya loik Dawgs?

Our daughter has a rat’s tail.

But probably not for much longer.

Will the Real Charlie Rock Starr Please Stand Up

Today, whilst enjoying the sun at Coram’s Fields with his sister and mum, Charlie stood up.

He didn’t use anything to help him stand up, but H turned to find him just standing there – unaided for about 15 seconds.

Now, surely at 9 and a half months he’s a little previous where standing is . . . → Read More: Will the Real Charlie Rock Starr Please Stand Up

So it begins

Please note: this video is fairly boring to anyone other than a grandparent.

There are two different techniques going on here.

Mathilda is so pig-headed and determined, she’d do her rather excellent commando crawl over six miles of broken glass just to investigate a teeny-tiny speck of fluff with her teeny-tiny, pokey finger.

The other day, H just about grabbed her before she toppled down the back step.

Charlie on the other hand doesn’t move that much at all. But he continually goes through a series of stretches and exercises. Building up his stamina. Preparing.

Kinda reminds me of that scene in Cape Fear when DeNiro is doing the pull-ups.

Nothing is safe.

Crawlaggedon is upon us.

Advanced Oral Hygene

Ok, ok.

A massive cliche yes, just one look at the list of videos next to this one on youtube confirms it’s a popular subject, but there’s nothing that stirs the parental loins more than a baby in a bath.

Or two babies in this case (thanks for the bath seat Chez and Glenn, they . . . → Read More: Advanced Oral Hygene